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Sex and the mad Mullahs

July 6, 2007



The ordinary Iranian is not insane. It's the political leaders in Tehran who are nuts.

I have proof. Of both. Over the past few years, I've taught English to quite a number of new Canadians from Iran. They were all determined to learn English as fast as possible, get jobs in their chosen fields and find out as much as they could about sexual habits prohibited by the Mullahs.

"What is this awful sex I keep hearing about," asked a 40-ish man one day. Turned out he was inquiring about oral sex, something I declined to explain to him. Somehow, I think he and his wife may now be doing that awful stuff.

Turns out the Tehran Mullahs preach the one-position-for-procreation theory of sex, with strict limitations. One of them mused not too long ago that it might be all right if married people see each other naked, but it's much better if they have sexual relations in the dark, preferably with as little skin available as possible.

Another man, an avid swimmer, remarked that one of the many reasons he was glad to be in Canada was that he could swim with his wife and two daughters, something he had never done before.

And one woman, a doctor, said she knew it wouldn't be easy to get her medical licence in Canada and would take any job for now. "I'll drive a bus," she said.

My students were funny, sometimes outrageous, hardworking and open to new ways of living. What they weren't is radical or extreme.

The same cannot be said for those aged Mullahs, nutbar President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and their sycophantic puppets.

For example, earlier this week, Delaram Ali, a young woman of 24, was sentenced to nearly three years in prison and 10 lashes for attending a women's rights rally - which, of course, was banned. She is one of four women, so far, to be convicted over this protest in which some 70 people were arrested.

In Iran, a woman's testimony is only worth half that of a man's and property rights are almost non-existent. These are but two of the many injustices perpetrated against women.

Officially, the Iranian government insists it does not discriminate against women because its laws are based on the Islamic sharia code. Surely, that wouldn't be the same sharia code that was, mercifully briefly, considered in Ontario in 2004 to settle family matters. Obviously, not all nutbars live in Tehran.

In the ongoing controversy over women's rights in Iran, nothing is more volatile than the fuss over "unIslamic dress."

In April, the Mullahs authorized a "bad hijab" crackdown during which thousands of young women were stopped on the streets or pulled off buses. Some were issued a warning and some were arrested.

Their crime? A headscarf worn so that their hair could show.

And speaking of buses, Iranian women must ride at the back of the bus. This symbol of the fight for civil rights is probably not familiar to the idiots in Tehran.

Just as the irony of the hijab controversy is lost on those good citizens of Quebec who insist Muslim women and girls must remove their headscarfs. Take it off! No, put it back on! Not until Iranian women, and Muslim women everywhere, can dress as they please, with or without the hijab, speak as they please, act and work as they please, will there be equality.

Unfortunately, those crazy old men in Tehran have dampened the spirit of many young women.

"I can't do anything. I just try not to let them hurt me," said one young woman, too afraid to give her name.

Perhaps she feared 10 lashes or worse for speaking up.



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