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Necessary
Tips for Raising Children Islamically http://www.islamonline.net/servlet/Satellite?pagename=IslamOnline-English-Ask_Scholar/FatwaE/FatwaE&cid=1119503545244 Wa`alaykum As-Salaamu Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh. In The Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful. All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace
and blessings be upon His Messenger. Dear questioner, thank you very much for your good
and impressive question, and we hope our efforts, which are purely for Allah’s
Sake, meet your expectations. Indeed, Allah creates children with pure innate
nature, and whatever defects that happen later is the result of bad education.
The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, is reported to have said: “Every
child is born on Fitrah (man’s innate disposition to monotheism), his parents
make him Jewish, Christian or a fire worshipper.” (Reported by Al-Bukhari and
Muslim) That is why Islam has ordered parents to take care
of their children and to bring them up according to the Islamic manners. Focusing more on the very interesting question you
have raised, we would like to cite the following: Allah Almighty has entrusted parents with their
children. Parents bear the responsibility to raise up their children in the
Islamic way. If they do that they will be blessed in this life and in the
Hereafter, and if they don’t, they will get bad result during their life and in
the Hereafter. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) is
reported to have said: “All of you are guardians and all of you are responsible
for things under your guardianship; the ruler is a guardian (managing his
state’s affairs) and he is responsible for things under his care, the man is a
guardian over his family and responsible for them, the woman is a guardian of
her husband’s house and she is responsible for it. All of you are guardians and
responsible for things under your control.” (Reported by Al-Bukhari and Muslim) The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, did
not excuse any one from responsibility that Allah has put on every individual
to build the Islamic society: the ruler is responsible: the man and woman are
responsible…. all within their capabilities, domains, and authorities… and the
loss of Islam from our Muslim Ummah these days is nothing but a result of the
neglect of responsibility. Men and women, fathers and mothers share the
responsibility to raise up, educate, and build the new generation in the
correct method and the right way. Man has in him the good and bad tendencies, so
parents must encourage and grow the good tendencies in the child so he can
become a useful person that helps himself and his people. Referring to this,
Allah Almighty says: (O’ you who believe, protect yourselves and your families
from a fire whose fuel is men and stones. ) (At-Tahreem: 6) The protection of yourself and your family from
Hell-Fire won’t be with anything but good education, the practice of good
morals, and the guidance to nobility. Islam does not distinguish between male and female
with regard to the education requirements. The Prophet (peace and blessings be
upon him) is reported to have said: “Whoever has a daughter, tutors her on good
morals, educates her well and feeds her properly; she will be a protection for
him from Hell-Fire.” What do we mean by good education? The good
education means the physical, mental and moral preparation of the child so he
can become a good individual in the good society. Methods
for Moral Upbringing: 1- Showing the values of good deeds and their
effects on the individuals and society; also showing the effects of bad deeds,
all within the child’s capability of understanding. 2- Parents should be a good example in their
behavior because children like to imitate their parents in their sayings and
their deeds. 3- Teaching the child the religious principles and
tutoring him in worship, taking into account the child’s capability of
understanding. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) is reported to
have said: “Order your children to pray at the age of seven.” 4- Treating children nicely and kindly. The Prophet
(peace and blessings be upon him) taught us that practically. When he was
praying as an Imam with the people, his grandson Al-Hasan, son of his daughter
Fatimah, may Allah be pleased with them rode his back while he was bowing. The
Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, lengthened his bow. When he finished
his prayer, some attending Companions said, “You lengthened your bow?” Then the
Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, answered, “My grandson rode my back
and I hate hastening him” 5- One of the important things that parents must
teach their children is to choose the good company and to the avoid the bad
one, because children are always influenced by the company they keep. The bad
behavior can be easily transmitted through bad company. So the Prophet, peace
and blessings be upon him, warned us by saying, “Man is inclined to get
influenced by his friend’s manners, so one must be careful in choosing
friends.” (Reported by Abu Dawud & At-Tirmidhi) 6- Encouraging the child’s sense of belonging to the
Muslim Ummah, by teaching him of the brotherhood between Muslims, teaching him
to care for Muslims in any land, and that he is part of the Muslim body, to
feel joy when Muslims are joyous, to feel sad for Muslims’ sadness, and to do
best to achieve the Muslim Ummah’s goals. All of this can be done practically
through: A- Taking children to Mosques and introducing them
to their brother in Islam regardless of race, language, or origin. B- Teaching the children the history of the Prophet,
peace and blessings be upon him, and his Companions and the history of Islam,
bearing in mind the child’s capability of understanding. C- Encouraging children to sympathize with Muslim
problems and to contribute to the solutions such as the poverty problem and to
donate some money to the hungry Muslim children. D- Taking part in the celebrations and festivals
with Muslims, and sharing picnics and creating ties with their Muslim brothers
of the same age. 7- Imbuing in children the feeling of love of Allah,
His Prophet, Muslims, and all people. This love will lead to special behavior
towards all those loved. These are general guidelines to raise our children
Islamically, so every Muslim must take care of his children and know the
correct path that must be followed. This will help us do the job we are
entrusted to do as Allah proscribed, as well as the responsibility the Prophet,
peace and blessings be upon him, has clarified, with aim of protecting the
future generations of Muslims, as Allah Almighty says: (And Say Do deeds! Allah
will see your deeds, and (so will) his Messenger and the believers. And you
will be brought back to the All-Knower of the unseen and the seen. Then He will
inform you of what you used to do. ) (At-Tawbah: 105) The above quotation is excerpted with slight modifications
from: www.zawaj.com ~ by euraktiva786 on 27, March 2009. http://euraktiva786.wordpress.com/2009/03/27/necessary-tips-for-raising-children-islamically/ |
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