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What Kind of Muslim
Am I Posted by Ginny on November 22, 2009 Assalamu alaikum, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about what kind of a Muslim I am. Or, I should say, what kind of a person I am. Muslim only being part of that. The thing is, I have a way of seeing both sides of things, of seeing the gray area, of seeing the nuances in things. Perhaps that’s why the one-size-fits-all approach to Islam that some people have, or the Salafi/Wahhabi strain of Islam, with its attendant harshness and severity, and lack of flexibility, never appealed to me. Though at the same time, it’d not be fair to clasify me as some kinda liberal Muslim who is watering down the religion either. Though I’m sure some would put me in that cateogry and that’s OK. See, some things, I’d be considered to be a Liberal on (such as issues of social justice), whereas with other things, I’m quite Conservative, and then I have an opinion that says that maybe for me it’s not OK, but for someone else, that opinion might be different. There are many issues like that. For example, I think abortion generally is wrong, except in cases where the life of the mother is in danger, and possibly in cases of rape or incest. I don’t, however, think that abortion should be freely available to anyone who wants it. Having said that, though, I’m not going to go on any kind of pro-life march, I’m not going to picket abortion clinics, and I’m not going to seek to change the laws one way or another. I just don’t feel the need to do that, as at this point, my opinions don’t fit into either of the camps campaigning on either side for a change to the law as it stands now. Homosexuality is another topic that I kind of have a nuanced view on, because it’s obviously not right, so I’m not going to campaign for gay marriage, but I’m also not going to be a vigilante and try to find out what people are doing in their own bedrooms either. And I also don’t think people should be targeted for being gay either. Because until our country truly becomes a “Christian” or some other “religious” country, and while we’re a secular nation, people can pretty much do what they want. But I can’t support gay marriage on religious grounds. I just can’t, and I can see where that issue is compared to the civil rights issue, etc., but I just don’t agree with that, except if you’re talking about violence or discrimination against gays, then perhaps I could get behind that. But saying that preventing anyone other than a man and a woman from getting married should be a civil rights issue, and is an act of discrimination in and of itself, I don’t agree with. Saying that you don’t think that homosexuals should be mistreated is not the same as saying you support gay marriage. Just as saying that Muslims in the military should be supported, or that what Nidal Hasan did was dispicable, is not the same as saying that it’s OK or encouraged for Muslims to serve in the military, and I don’t know of any Muslims who are actually encouraging Muslims to serve in the military. As I said in my previous post, I’d like to know who has said this and on what show so I can look it up. And as I’ve also said before, given that you have many US military installations in so-called “Muslim lands”, it doesn’t make the issue as cut-and-dry as it would seem to appear to be. I also don’t have some kinda narrow definition of manhood or womanhood that’s based on my neighborhood, upbringing or what the latest pop or rap song tells me it should be. And then try to apply that to Islam. If some of the Mothers of the Believers (may Allah reward them all) fought in battles, and if the Prophet (peace be upon him) was reported to have helped with the household chores, then who am I to go around accusing other Muslims of not being man enough, or being too feminine. My husband does the majority of the cooking in this house, and farbeit for me or anyone else, for that matter, to question his manhood just because he cooks. I think before we talk about what being a “man” is and what being a “woman” is, we need to get to the heart of what we’re talking about. Because sometimes you have very emotional men, and sometimes you have very stoic women, that doesn’t mean that there’s something wrong with them, and it most certainly doesn’t mean they’re “gay”. And while I’m aware of Al Fatiha (the gay Muslim group) and certain “progressive” Muslims, I don’t think they represent the majority of the Muslim community, anymore than the extremists do. And while some media outlets may give them a voice that isn’t proportional to their influence in the community, it doesn’t mean that they’re taking hold or taking over or anything else. And groups like Zaytuna, etc., are not “progressive” in the sense that they want to water down Islam, they don’t condone homosexuality (though it seems many want to hold on to this falacy even though it’s been proven to be patently false), etc., and if there are any “gay Muslims” at the “white house iftar”, I’m certainly not aware of it. Perhaps groups like Zaytuna realize the world we live in, that while they don’t want to water down the religion, that perhaps talking about Jihad all of the time might not be such a good idea, given the climate that we find ourselves in and given the weak state of the Muslim Ummah in this day and age! This doesn’t mean that they’re hiding the truth or not speaking the truth, it’s just that, well, how can we fight any kind of Jihad when our own souls and communities are in such a shambles (remember we’ve got the “kuffar” in “Muslim lands” no doubt). What good is talking about “jihad” when it would make things worse for the Muslims? Perhaps that is the angle that it should be looked at, and not from the “oh those Muslims are just a bunch of feminized and/or gay Muslims who want to water down Islam to make it pallitable to George W. Bush and the Rand Corporation, etc.) Anyway, I digress. So anyway, here is the kind of Muslim I am… I am a Muslim who strives to adhere to the Qur’an and Sunnah the best way I know how. I strive to perfect my character and purify my heart the best way I can. I do this by following Maliki fiqh, and a tariqa, though the tariqa part isn’t necessary but optional (and as far as I’m concerned the madhhab part is optional too, though based on those I’ve asked and my limited research, I have come to the understanding that it’s necessary). And just because I do the above doesn’t mean I’m somehow trying to water down or ignore the Qur’an and Sunnah, it’s just that I don’t have the knowledge to make rulings for myself so I defer to those who have that knowledge, in issues that I don’t have the answer for. And Muslims serving in the military is but one example of one of those answers that I don’t feel I can make a ruling on. I am the kind of Muslim who thinks that celebrating non-Muslim holidays isn’t necessarily haram either, as long as said holiday doesn’t have a religious connotation to it. For example, I’m getting ready to celebrate Thanksgiving on Thursday (in fact I’ve been planning the menu today, I’m having turkey, dressing, mashed potatoes and gravy, green bean casserole, cranberry sauce, rolls and pumpkin pie). Now I understand why some would not celebrate such a day given its history, but I tend to look at it as a day to spend with friends and family, to take time to give thanks for what I have, for what Allah has given me (and I sheepishly have to admit that I also get to eat a bunch of food and watch football, too), and I can’t see how that could be wrong/a bad thing. Now of course, I’m not going to celebrate Christmas, Easter, Valentine’s Day, or Halloween. Again, providing perspective is key here. If you feel that you yourself shouldn’t celebrate a certain holiday, then don’t. But in areas where there may be a difference of opinion on the issue, why can’t we just live and let live, and let those who celebrate, celebrate, and those who don’t, don’t. But that’s just something that some of us Muslims can’t do. We don’t feel quite right unless we’re “haram-ing” someone, “takfir-ing” someone, “kuffar-ing” someone, or otherwise issuing cyber/insta-fatwas to one and all, with absolutely no knowledge or qualification to do so. Some of us can’t be satisfied unless we’re sticking our fingers in someone else’s plate, so to speak. And perhaps that’s why I don’t know about supposedly all of the Muslims who’ve been going around on all of the TV/radio programs telling Muslims it’s OK to serve in the US military, or about the “gay Muslims at the white house iftar”, because I’ve just not been paying attention. I’ve kinda been busy and stressed with work, I’ve been dealing with my own issues of self-esteem, self-worth, etc., the same issues I’ve always struggled with. I’ve been completely dissatisfied with myself lately. Because I’ve completely lost the spiritual progress that I’d made during Ramadan. I’ve been struggling with a lowness in Iman lately, though Alhamdulillah it’s gotten much better. Basically, I’ve kinda been too busy to notice what other Muslims were doing, and I tried to ignore what Nidal Hasan did, because honestly, take the “Muslim” out of it and he just seems to be a man who had severe mental issues that unfortunately weren’t dealt with soon enough to prevent the injury and loss of life that ended up happening. “Islam” or “being a Muslim” doesn’t seem to have much to do with it, except that he didn’t want to go to Iraq/Afghanistan, though shouldn’t he have known all of that before he joined? Or couldn’t he have gotten out when it became clear that we’d be fighting in those places, if fighting in those places made him so distressed? Anyway, these are questions that I, personally, don’t have the answers to. And I’m digressing again. Basically, I tend not to look at things as “black and white”, because many times, there is a lot of gray area. I mean, clearly, there are certain things that are unanimously known to be haram, so I’m not saying that there’s a gray area regarding zina or alcohol or anything like that. But once you get passed the five pillars, and the things that are by unanimous concensus of the scholars known to be halal or haram as the case may be, then you get into a lot of the gray area, that perhaps Muslims in the US military, or listening to music, or celebrating non-Muslim holidays might fall. And I’m generally the kind of Muslim who tries to live and let live, even if there’s something that I don’t agree with. Because there could be something going on behind-the-scenes, out of my view, that I don’t know about. And I sure don’t want to pop off at the mouth about something that I thought I knew, then find out later that I had no idea what I was talking about, that there were perhaps things going on that I didn’t know about. I mean, I can’t talk about the “coffee shop Muslims in the Bay Area”, because I’ve never been to a copy shop in the Bay Area, and I’ve only been to California once. And the Muslims I saw there weren’t what you’d call “liberal” or “watered-down” Muslims, I can most definitely assure you. And as far as “white house iftars” go, I’ve never been to DC or the White House, so again, can’t speak on that either. My experience of the Muslim community has been quite limited really, and perhaps not that representative. And I have indeed made the mistake of speaking about certain aspects of the Muslim community that I indeed had no knowledge of, and got called on it quite severely. So I truly don’t want to make that mistake again. And it’d sure be nice if others didn’t continue to make that mistake either. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- http://ginnysthoughts.wordpress.com/2009/11/22/what-kinda-muslim-am-i/ |
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