How Hijab is Not Necessarily Hijab :-(
TUESDAY, APRIL 29, 2008
Again, I was hoping to ignore this blog for a bit but stuff keeps happening that I must blog about!
Here's the story:
My mom is told of a good hijabi girl, from a great family, well educated, reputable family, etc, etc...
I'm shown a picture of her, and although I am busy with my 2nd Quest, I figure, what the heck, she seems like a great girl, yeah I'd like to meet her.
Alright, so my mom calls her mom, they have a nice chat. Seems like a nice, down to earth family. One interesting thing is her mom says that her daughter's hijab "does not impress" her. My mom wasn't sure what that meant. But whatever, maybe she wears too tight clothes or something, it's hard to be a perfect Muslim these days.
Anyways, a meeting is setup.
My mom tells me of this meeting. Great!
Then, on a whim, I go on facebook, and facebook this girl. To see if she has anything.
I search her name. Her profile comes up. Oooh...I can view her profile!
Lots of pictures. Hmmm..in this picture, she's a little bit too close to this guy. What's up with that? Maybe that's her brother? Let's check that...no.
Next picture...she's hugging this dude. Please be her brother!
Huh? Is this the right girl?
Another picture...her head tilted towards other guy's head. Touching.
One more pic...a guy is carrying her. She's smiling.
Another one...a very close body to body hug with another guy. Her hip is leaned towards his.
I'm reminded of this funny article I read a long time ago: Facebook Ruins Marriage Proposal.
I guess this is what her mom meant when she said "her hijab does not impress me".
So the question is? What should I do? Just not meet her at all, or continue with the meeting but mention these pictures somehow? I am 100% confident this is the girl, and these pictures were from a dance party with some friends of hers in school. I can't believe she has them on facebook...maybe she didn't know people like me can view them. Thank God!
"No good guys". Ha!
POSTED BY QUEST AT 7:50 PM
LABELS: HIJAB IS NOT HIJAB, SADDENED, SHOCKED
meet her anyways...maybe the pics were from awhile ago...or maybe she's had a change of heart since then...or maybe she is just stuck in this phase and needs someone to guide her out of it. 8:36 PM
I agree with anonymous...you shouldn't be too quick to judge so do meet her and see what she's like face to face. She may have experienced a change of heart. Everyone does goofy things whilst they're growing up and if they regret it and change their life completely then they definitely deserve a second chance.
I would ask her more about it though just to find out- maybe ask a few probing questions like 'What do you think about friendships with men?'
You'll get extra hasanat for investigating the situation throughly and not just making a judgement without seeing all the information 5:21 AM
I like Arima's view. We should always give people the benefit of the doubt.
Unfortunately, Qwest, hijabi girls hugging and touching other men isn't unheard of. As matter of fact, 99% of my facebook friends from my MSA have aforementioned pictures. This is especially prevalent among the Egyptian girls in Egypt. Surprisingly girls and boys have an over-friendly type of relationship, that is approved by parents and society.
Can you judge someone for that? I don't know. I think culture influences people. Only the few people who choose to be 'practicing' and follow the unconventional practices of being conservative is rare. Mostly these girls will be busy in Halaqahs, etc.
Just my two cents. 6:06 AM